Funny Answers from Students on Music Exams

• The principal singer of nineteenth-century opera was called pre-Madonna.
• It is easy to teach anyone to play the maracas. Just grip the neck and shake him in rhythm.
• Gregorian chant has no music, just singers singing the same lines.
• Sherbet composed the Unfinished Symphony.
• All female parts were sung by castrati. We don't know exactly what they sounded like because there are no known descendants.
• Music sung by two people at the same time is called a duel; if they sing without music it is called Acapulco.
• A virtuoso is a musician with real high morals.
• Contralto is a low sort of music that only ladies sing.
• A harp is a nude piano.
• The main trouble with a French Horn is that it is too tangled up.
• An interval in music is the distance from one piano to the next.
• The correct way to find the key to a piece of music is to use a pitchfork.
• Agitato is a state of mind when one's finger slips in the middle of playing a piece.
• Refrain means don't do it. A refrain in music is the part you'd better not try to sing.
• I know what a sextet is but I'd rather not say.
• Most authorities agree that music of antiquity was written long ago.
• My favorite composer was Opus. Agnus Dei was a woman composer famous for her church music.
• Henry Purcell was a well-known composer few people have ever heard of.
• Johann Sebastian Bach wrote a great many musical compositions and had a large number of children. In between he practiced on an old spinster which he kept up in his attic.

Great questions, greater answers

Not only our technical knowledge helps, but also the presence of mind and the right answer at right time.

Even if u don't know the answer for a question just confuse the questioner.

Question and the Answer given by Candidates...oh sorry...they are IAS Officers now.

Q.How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?
A. Concrete floors are very hard to crack! (UPSC Topper)

Q.If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall, how long would it take four men to build it?
A. No time at all it is already built. (UPSC 23 Rank Opted for IFS)

Q.If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have?
A. Very large hands.(Good one) (UPSC 11 Rank Opted for IPS)

Q. How can you lift an elephant with one hand?
A. It is not a problem, since you will never find an elephant with one hand. (UPSC Rank 14 Opted for IES)

Q. How can a man go eight days without sleep?
A. No Probs , He sleeps at night. (UPSC IAS Rank 98)

Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become?
A. It will Wet or Sink as simple as that. (UPSC IAS Rank 2)

Q. What looks like half apple ?
A : The other half. (UPSC - IAS Topper )

Q. What can you never eat for breakfast ?
A : Dinner.

Q. What happened when wheel was invented ?
A : It caused a revolution.

Q. Bay of Bengal is in which state?
A : Liquid (UPSC 33Rank )

Interviewer said "I shall either ask you ten easy questions or one really difficult question. Think well before you make up your mind!" The boy thought for a while and said, "my choice is one really difficult question."

"Well, good luck to you, you have made your own choice! Now tell me this. "What comes first, Day or Night?"

> The boy was jolted into reality as his admission depends on the correctness of his answer, but he thought for a while andsaid, "It's the DAY sir!" "How" the interviewer asked, "Sorry sir, you promised me that you will not ask me a SECOND difficult question!" He was selected for IIM!

Great differences

If you don't have a sense of humour, please don't read any further.....

1) What is the difference between women and puppies?
A: Puppies grow up.
2) Why do women always have a stupid look on their faces?
Answer: Because they are...
3) What do women have in common with ceramic tiles?
Answer: Fix them properly once and you can walk all over them forever.
4) If you drop a women and a brick out of a plane,which one would hit the ground first?
Answer: Who cares?????.....
5) What did God say after he created woman?
(This ones THE BEST)
Answer: I can do better than this! And then he created man.
6) What's the difference between an intelligent woman & a UFO ?
Answer:I don't know, I've never seen either.
7) What are two reasons why women don't mind their own business?
Answers: i) no mind ii) no business
8) What makes women chase men when they have no intention of marrying?
Answer: The same urge that makes dogs chase vehicles when they have no intention of driving.

Why aren't you married

Comebacks to the age old question - "Why aren't you married yet?"

• You haven't asked yet.
• I was hoping to do something meaningful with my life.
• What? And spoil my great life?
• Because I just love hearing this question.
• It gives my mother something to live for.
• My fiance is awaiting parole.
• I'm still hoping for a shot at Miss America.
• I'm waiting until I get to be your age.
• It didn't seem worth a blood test.
• I already have enough laundry to do, thank you.
• I'd have to forfeit my billion dollar trust fund.
• What? And lose all the money I've invested in running personal ads?
• I don't want to have to support another person on my paycheck.
• Why aren't you thin?
• I'm married to my career, although recently we have been considering a trial separation.